Warm the Home

At my last women's group meeting, one of the ladies mentioned that a goal of hers was to "warm the home" on a daily basis when she got home from work.  As she elaborated it became clear that she didn't mean just turning on the heater on chilly days, but to create an overall warm and inviting atmosphere for herself and her husband. 

I immediately decided that this was something I wanted to do when Aaron gets home from work.  Since I'm at home most of the time and Aaron doesn't come home until fairly late, it's easy to get into a routine where the TV is my companion in the evenings.  But what husband likes to come home to his wife absorbed in reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond?  (Answer: Not even Raymond.)  So I've been thinking of ways I can warm the home for my hubby and make his coming home a pleasure.  Here are some of the things I've come up with:

Tidy up the living room and light some candles

Make a couple of simple appetizers for "at-home happy hour"

Have a beer or cocktail ready for him when he walks in

Start dinner (Aaron loves to smell dinner cooking when he walks in the door)

Bake something - there's nothing like the smell of fresh banana bread!

Turn off the TV and turn on some music

As I thought about the things I could do to make coming home a pleasure for my hubby, I realized that as a temporary stay-at-home wife, I wasn't feeling particularly excited to be home all day myself. So why not "warm the home" during the day for myself as well?

Daily warming the home tips:

Keep the spaces I use most often tidy at all times. It gets real depressing staring at a messy desk or end table every day.

Make myself a cup of tea or coffee when I get up

Turn on some music

Place bouquets of flowers throughout the house

Work on home-beautifying projects that I enjoy (not necessarily just the things that need to get done)

Set the table / arrange a simple centerpiece display for the dining table

It can be fun playing the 1950's housewife if you have the time!  I realize, however, that most people don't have the luxury of not working, and creating a warm atmosphere when you get home from a long day at work isn't always a top priority.  I know when I was working at my old stressful job, most of the time I'd come home, hunker down on the couch and not want to move for the rest of the night.  I'd be so exhausted that it wouldn't occur to me to do even the most basic things - sometimes even something as simple as turning on the light until it was nearly completely dark!  Even if you're that worn out at the end of a long day, try a couple of these simple warming the home tips and I bet it will improve your mood and make coming home more enjoyable:

If it's dark, turn on the lights! (It had to be said.)

Turn on the heat if it's cold; if it's warm, open the windows and enjoy some fresh air

Light a few candles

Light incense or a scented candle

Turn on some music

Make a cocktail or pour a glass of wine

Your home is your sanctuary!  Use it to its best advantage to help you and your partner/roommate/pet relax and recharge your batteries every day.

P.S. For the ladies - check out my latest post at L&T about shopping in your own closet :)

A Fresh Start

I guess by now saying I've neglected this blog is a moot point.  I've been posting infrequently on my infertility blog for the past several months, but even that hasn't felt quite right.  Oh I'm still infertile alright, but family-building has sort of taken a backseat in Aaron's and my life lately.  Although we do occasionally talk about one day adopting a child, we have to admit it's quite nice not having the responsibility of raising a little person.  We dream of traveling the world and financial freedom and early retirement...  Of course none of these things is feasible at the moment, and neither is adoption for that matter.  So we're pretty much enjoying what we have and looking forward to what the future has in store for us.

Not that we're sitting back and waiting for the future to come to us!  After months of job-hunting with nothing to show for it but my own increasing frustration, we've decided to start a business!  Or rather, re-start a business.  My parents once owned a very successful party store, which they sold about 10 years ago.  It's changed hands a couple of times since; then, at the beginning of 2012, it finally went out of business.  It would have been kind of sad seeing the store get slowly emptied out if my dad hadn't been talking for months about the possibility of starting another one.  As fate would have it, my frustration at the job market peaked just as I learned of the old store's closure, and I decided the only way I would be happy was to be my own boss!  So, with my parents' guidance, that's what I'm doing.

I announced my plans to become a party-planning, balloon-selling, beer-slinging, wedding-coordinating business owner to my family and friends and have been overwhelmed with the support I've gotten!  My parents handed over all the equipment and inventory they'd kept when they originally sold their store, and I'm meeting with them regularly to talk logistics.  I'm kicking things off with a little experiment to test the balloon market by selling and delivering Valentine's Day bouquets, and so many of my friends and family have posted my flyers in their places of business that I've lost count!  My sister and her husband even offered to let me use their SUV to deliver the bouquets since all I have are a pickup truck and a little car.  People are taking my flyers and showing interest, but I haven't gotten very many orders just yet.  I'm hoping they're procrastinators like me and waiting until the day gets closer.  But even if I don't end up making money off this little experiment, it's not going to stop me from going after my goal of becoming self-employed!  I already have one wedding lined up for this summer that I'm coordinating, and planning/decorating events is the direction I really want to take this business.

At the risk of making this post sound like a family Christmas letter, I'll add that the VD home life has been amazing since I've been FUNemployed.  Both Aaron and I are so relieved that I'm no longer working for the bank; the stress of working there was really taking a toll on my physical and mental health.  I may be far from the world's best housekeeper, cook, and grocery shopper, but I make an effort, and at least I have energy now to be a supportive wife when my hubby needs it!

I'd promise to be a better blogger here, but you've heard that one before.  I am planning on posting pics of my V-day balloons though, so come back soon :)

Shameless Plug: If you're planning a private / company / school event in the Ventura area give me a call or email OriginalMrSuds@gmail.com.

Woo-WHO

I'm a horrible blogger! Does anyone even still read this blog? I wouldn't be surprised if the few friends and family I had following along have now completely abandoned it due to my absence.

As a sign of good faith that I will no longer neglect BeingVonD, I would like to share some good news with you (and no, I'm not pregnant. Would I do that to you?):

Not that I'm all that impressed by or interested in the World Health Organization, but they recently did something that could eventually (hopefully) be very important in the infertile world - they defined infertility as a disease.

My favorite quote from this press release, which pretty much sums up why this news is so important to people dealing with infertility: "For too long those suffering from infertility have had their condition slighted or even ignored. Insurance companies don't pay to treat it, governments don't put adequate resources to study it and consequently patients suffer. We hope that this international recognition that infertility is, in fact, a disease will allow it to be treated like other diseases." - Dr. William Gibbons, President of the American Society for Reproductive Medicine.

Honestly I'm amazed that it took this long to classify infertility as a disease, when OF COURSE there are physical problems that can prevent women from getting pregnant (and men from impregnating women). Endometriosis, PCOS, hormonal imbalances, blocked fallopian tubes, varicocele... Contrary to popular opinion, it has nothing to do with relaxing.

Now we just need more insurance companies, and the employers who provide insurance benefits to their employees, to see the light too. I can't tell you how incredibly frustrating it is to have something wrong with you but not be able to have it treated because it's deemed "elective," not medically necessary. (But the same insurance company will pay for an abortion if one had the opposite "problem." How is that not elective?) And I'm not talking about treatments that are remotely controversial, or even very expensive. Many of the problems that cause infertility can be treated surgically or with medication. But most insurance companies refuse to cover anything related to infertility. Hopefully that will begin to change soon.

Anyway, kudos to the WHO for doing something positive and relevant to my life! It may never benefit me personally, but endometriosis is hereditary and I may have a daughter one day.

Feeling Accomplished

(APO L&T)

Well we had a very productive weekend! It's awesome to start off the new year finishing up a bunch of projects that we've been meaning to do for oh... a year and a halfish... So here's our weekend in photos:

First off, we finally got a new curtain rod and sheers, and re-hung our new curtains for our front window! It's amazing how much more finished the window looks. Plus now we can get some sunlight in during the day and still retain a little privacy. (Oh yeah, we also cleaned this window inside and out, but you obviously can't tell in this pic.)

Wow that is one bright photo! This is our kitchen, and I made these cafe curtains today. This was one of our "fishbowl" rooms, as the window on the right faces directly into one of our neighbor's windows. The walls are such a stark white that I wanted to break it up with some dark, bold curtains. There are two panels for each window so they can open up down the middle. I think they turned out pretty nice!

Here's a close-up of the fabric.

Our blinds for our bedroom and office arrived on Thursday (they match the ones in the living room), so Aaron put all four sets up today as well. I'll have to take off some of those extra slats to give them a more "custom" look, but aren't they nice? JCPenney ROCKS. We got these for 50% off!

And finally, I made this little drawstring bag for my Wii Fit Balance Board. Aaron had told me they sell covers for like $20, but I figured I could whip something up myself for a lot cheaper than that, and I did! I just bought a yard of flannel (way more than I actually needed) and knocked this sucker out in about 30 minutes.

Ahh... I feel so accomplished now! The inside of our house feels so much more complete with all the window treatments finished, and I'm sure our neighbors appreciate it too. :)

'Tis the Season

Well, Thanksgiving is over and it seems like everyone is diving headfirst into Christmas! Personally, I like a little buffer time between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Ya know, to let the turkey settle, finish off the leftovers, then maybe starve myself for a few days to get my weight back to normal...

I guess it never occurred to me how many people I know put up their Christmas trees and lights the day after Thanksgiving. Who knew?? I don't think I've ever in my life had a Christmas tree in the house before December, much less the day after Thanksgiving. Aaron and I both work on Black Friday every year so we never get our decorations up until well after December 1st. This year I feel like we're behind already! But I refuse to give in to peer pressure - the tree's not going up until we feel like it!

Now to figure out when I'll feel like it... I am going to admit something very shameful, try not to judge me too harshly now - for the past couple years I haven't really been looking forward to Christmas. I know!! What is wrong with me?? Sigh, I'm not a grinch or anything (no termites in my smile!), I just can't get into it. I think one reason for that is I feel like it's SUCH a busy time of year. There's something going on every weekend in December and it's stressful having to shop for everyone on the list. Especially when money is tight, as it tends to be for us at the end of the year. Another reason is that holidays are just hard in general when you're "child-free-not-by-choice." This will be Christmas number 3 for us hoping to be expecting, but not. Sometimes it's hard not to think about all the things we're missing out on by not having children.

So how do I fix my funk? Maybe Aaron and I need to start some traditions of our own. Something that will help me feel like the holiday is special and meaningful to us as a family, not just us as members of our extended family, and not as a reminder of what we 'should' have by now.

Yes, I think this will be a great year to start some traditions. And I'm taking suggestions as to what those traditions could be!